Such mix of thoughts

It has been quite some time since I wrote blog. Man updating is a real "pain in the ass". Anyway there has been alot of things that I want to speak about. My daily life, what have I encountered in the past few weeks. There was my birthday function, the issues in our political views, something about TV 3 programme and also what the heck went on yesterday 7/08/08.

Hahahaha I think I have to write like 3 different posts so this post is just like a introduction post. We all are so used to write introduction that we find it hard to write on something without an Introduction. So people please be sure to drop by and read the posts that I have posted. A few days ago I went to this place near my house and I cant remember where it was but I can remember I had this sense of "Deja Vu". That was not only the first time, that day during Ms. Angie class I had this sense that I was there and the comments given by my classmates sounded like i was there before.

Another time was when my lap top charger blew off. I went to this shop in Carefour Wangsa Maju to purchase a new one but the situation in the shop looks similar the to the one that I went in "Low Yat". Honestly I don't really know if I was dreaming about it or what but sincerely my mind related it and I must say it is a very spooky feeling. I didn't think about it much but upon writing this post I believe that I will not be able to sleep tonight. Lately I had been have some silly dreams as well. First was I dream about PKR Advisor Anwar Ibrahim got arrested for sodomy and was produced in court. Can you believe it? Me dreaming about politics? Man, Why cant I have normal dreams of pretty girls, clubbing, and stuff normal people do.

That was not only the time, the following next 3 days I had various dreams and all related to politics. Please help me! I desperately need a source of entertainment. There is a limit and clearly the only thing that runs through my mind is POLITICS. There were a few dreams about girls before my political dreams but that is irrelevant. Hahaha. Secrets are secrets. Ok. Back to my topic. I cant stop thinking of what I have gone through. I really think if I were not able to get into the politics I might commit suicide. Yeah Right!

Forget about my dreams and all. After my birthday that day, I had undergone process of too much thinking. Its like this. I prefer to show my masculine figure to other so that I will be looks up in the society. I have been brought up in a family where you do most of the things yourself. Does not matter how old are you, you want something do it yourself. Military house what, what to expect.

But I have to thank my folks because I believe that I have a high moral value and ways to live my life. There are mistakes that my parents and as well as other parents have done during their younger days and I am trying to stay away form all that. I have my dark side during my younger days but changing dy. People's attitude also can evolve. Hahaha.

Anyway, the thing that I wanted to say is, I tend to get too much attention. Is this a bad thing or good? Depends how you look at it. I have a laptop with Internet access, an apple, a watch I got for my birthday, stylish wallet, cool shoes and the I kind of like get to use the phones that I like, thanks to my Aunt. I mean she sees me as her own children and it would be a pity if I don't stand up to her expectations. I cant possibly let her, my mom who spent like RM 2,000 for my Birthday Function( but I don't know who paid really, mom or aunt, Who cares anyway its just either or) and my dad. For 21 years I didn't get any ting form my father. He got me a Digital Camera for my 21st birthday.

I was treated very badly since small but now he sees me as very much different. Why is that? It is because I'm studying now in the University, or I someone in the society. My are all parents like this ? When your child does not perform well you all will express all you regrets upon us but as the time goes and we perform well either in studies of life you all tend to say just because i push you during small that's why you all become like this. Hahaha. Too much thinking ready.

I do get that the parents intentions are good but the way that they show is wrong totally wrong. That's why there are miss understanding in the family and parents end up being treated badly by their own kids. Well I have too much stuff with me. I'm quite unhappy that I have so much and there are those who have so little and supposed to get better. I see my self as a child who gets everything without asking and what I have to do in return. "STUDY" is that so hard for me , that is the only thing that we are required to do and must do as in return.

But what if I fail? Then there is no point for me being a human at all. I hate the fact that some of the ones I know call me rich kid, gadget man and other shit names. Its not like they cant effort it or what. So why say that kind of names, just to irritate others ah! Please I beg you all do not assume cause you are not even allowed to assume such things. Some are not as you think they are, they don't show off or what. They get it that's all. So I have to make sure that I make it or else i really don't know what kind of human am I . Well said....